Cancer – Shattered Warrior

Scanxiety

This month is check-up month and the scanxiety is real. I find it much easier to not worry about the outcome when the appointments are still a couple of months away. “Out of sight, out of mind,” as the saying goes. But once the notifications become visible in my calendar, the little gremlin of fearContinue reading “Scanxiety”

Triggers

I recently started rewatching the TV show, House MD, for the umpteenth time. It’s one of those shows that triggers mega nostalgia from inside jokes with friends to bonding with hubby over it when we were still very newly wedded. Despite how big of the big role such shows played in shaping the early-twenties-me IContinue reading “Triggers”

Win or lose?

With today being Cancer Survivor’s Day, I find myself reflecting on what it means to be a ‘survivor’, but also has my heart aching for those who hung their ‘survivor’ hats up for good… I’ve never liked it when people say someone has “lost their battle against cancer.” I know no one who says thatContinue reading “Win or lose?”

Change is as good as a rest?

I never really understood what people meant when they said: change is as good a rest or a holiday. I’m fairly good at a adapting in the moment to a sporadic change. But big life changes causes me so much anxiety. I like to know a process or an outcome, so I can be sureContinue reading “Change is as good as a rest?”

If cancer had a face…

If cancer had a face and it was there for tired souls’ depart, would the sobs of those behind soften it’s heart? If cancer had a face and share the suffering of all the you ones, would it see each as a trophy that it owns? If cancer had a face and it witnessed ourContinue reading “If cancer had a face…”

It’s not me… it’s my hormones.

I recently had my usual check ups done – still no sign of recurrence!! We did learn that my ovaries are no longer producing enough estrogen, which is par for the course if I’m honest. My body keeps finding fun ways of surprising me with new things to deal with. I, not really being superContinue reading “It’s not me… it’s my hormones.”

Honesty On Living With An Ostomy

After nearly a year with my freaky friend – Bennie, the stoma – was evicted. And for damages done to the property, his deposit was not refunded. Even after a two year period where the entire world went into lock down as a result of a pandemic and people seem to want to duel toContinue reading “Honesty On Living With An Ostomy”

Little Anchor

We recently went to a jeweller to have my wedding ring cut off… a spell of dehydration caused some water retention that turned my fingies into nice pork sausages. The idea of cutting it caused me some heartache and anxiety, which is silly (I know). It was very uncomfortable and somewhat painful. We knew weContinue reading “Little Anchor”

An Impostor Among Us…

For the last couple of months I have been grappling with some pretty big self-doubts. Having survived and conquered the cancer mountain has left me feeling like I am operating in existential limbo. Everything has returned to a relative state of normalcy, but I no longer feel normal. With everything that changed, I don’t seemContinue reading “An Impostor Among Us…”

MY 2021 IN NUMBERS

2021 was a strange year for the world at large, and also for me personally – for non-Covid related reasons. We are nearing the end of the second month of 2022 and I am still daily processing everything that has happened since 08 December 2020. I’m on the other side of one of the biggestContinue reading “MY 2021 IN NUMBERS”